


Starlight

by Angelwingsl3 (Marie_Fanwriter)



Series: Macen & Avitus [8]
Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Angst, Art Embedded, Feels, Hope, M/M, M/M Rares 2018, Post-Canon Fix-It, Post-Game(s), Spectre Requisitions Rare Pair Exchange 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-03-28 20:58:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13912101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marie_Fanwriter/pseuds/Angelwingsl3
Summary: One day he'll see the stars again.*Art Embedded - Chapter 4*





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [isloremipsumafterall](https://archiveofourown.org/users/isloremipsumafterall/gifts).



> Note: Avitus is the new Turian Pathfinder and has a ship, the Adtonitus, much like Ryder’s Tempest along with a team of specialists from the various Andromeda species.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Request by isloremipsumafterall: There has to be a universe out there where these two go to be happy, please.
> 
> That place does exist, they just need to get there.

 

\---

Avitus Rix left his cabin at the front of the exploratory ship and headed back towards the cargo bay to await landing. He was fully suited in his armor, an assault rifle slung over his back and a pistol strapped to his hip, the suit’s helmet held under his right arm. The ex-Spectre considered bringing along a shotgun, but decided against it at the last minute. Havarl wasn’t a place he wanted to be weighed down, the jungle was too dense for that.

As much as he hated the planet, it was at the very least a known quantity. He was expectant of the endless rain, the stickiness of the humid air, and the musty scent that would be stuck in his nose for days after they’d left. There was nothing to be done about that, he had to go. As the turian Pathfinder, he had a job to do.

When Avitus stepped into the cargo bay, his chosen squad was standing at the ready near the exit ramp armored and ready to move. The pair couldn’t have been more different; Roor’sma was a tiny slip of a salarian female, their medic, and Nakmor Ted was an enormous krogan who acted as both their mechanic and resident muscle. The pair had known one another before coming to Andromeda and, for a reason he hadn’t been able to parse quite yet, were best friends.

“I still feel like we’re part of a bad joke,” Ted grumbled as he crossed his massive arms over his chest. “A salarian, a krogan, and a turian walk into a bar-”

Over the coms their human pilot, Warren, interrupted him with a feminine giggle. _“The turian really should have seen it coming!”_

Roor’sma groaned, dropping her face into her hands. “Was bad. Even for you, Warren.”

_“I saw an opening…”_

The three of them continued on for a few minutes, meanwhile Avitus hadn’t said a word since entering the room. They were used to his silence as much as he was getting used to their banter. He’d worked alone for so many years as a Spectre that it was taking him a long time to learn how to work within a team again. He’d been Blackwatch before ranking up to a Council agent and even they didn’t tend to work in teams quite like this.

Instead of engaging with them, he checked his weapons over and then brought up his omnitool to load up a map of the area. It was a simple topographical chart, the angara weren’t explorers it seemed. Their settlement was in the northern hemisphere on the opposing side of the planet and apparently that meant it wasn’t worth charting the rest of the world. He rarely missed the Hierarchy mentality, but now was one of those times.

A shift in his pilot’s tone alerted him that they were approaching destination and he tuned back into the conversation, _“Coming up on the signal, sir. I’ve got us a landing site about three clicks away. Best I can do, underbrush is fairly dense so you’ll have to use the jump-jets to get down.”_

Avitus’ hand went to his aural canal and he depressed the push to talk switch on the small device. “Understood, while we work on tracking down the source I want you to find a better landing site. We’ll come back to you.”

_“Wilco. Cloud cover is too low to do an effective visual flyby at the moment of the signal source. But at least if there’s anyone here they’ll have heard the ship.”_

“Continue attempting contact on the coms. All frequencies.”

He paid her no mind as she agreed with that command as well and shut off the com for now. Instead he pulled on his helmet and stepped up beside his squad. The mismatched pair looked at him a little strangely, Roor’sma breaking the silence. “Air breathable. Helmet not required.”

“It’s raining,” Ted replied before he could do it himself. “Rix is like that human animal Warren’s always talkin about. The one angara look like. Don’t like water.”

It was close enough to the truth, so Avitus inclined his head to the krogan in a wordless gesture of agreement. While salarians liked the rain, and krogan just didn’t seem to care, his species tended to like a drier climate. “That... and there’s potential for hostile fauna, I’d rather have my HUD at the ready.”

“Right. Yes. Told us that.” she replied, mumbling a series of additional agreements before tapping at her own visor and bringing up the screen he recognized as a combat display module. “Better. Is safe choice.”

A handful of minutes later the ramp started to open, and the sound of heavy rain began began to echo through the cargo bay. Avitus led the way, a handful of steps taking him to the end of the ramp before he jumped without fear. He’d long since forgotten his fear of heights. Saren had beat it out of him early on in his Spectre training.

He wasn’t afraid of much anymore.

He landed gracefully on the jungle floor and moved quickly out of the dropzone as right behind him came Roor’sma and then Ted. The former just as stealthy as his own jump, while the latter landed exactly as one would expect three hundred kilos of krogan to land.

His amber gaze scanned the tree line quickly, fifteen years of Spectreship and fifteen years of Hierarchy service prior to that had made everything he did instinctual. He treated it just like every other mission that he’d even been on, moving slowly forwards and checking constantly for hostiles.

Without waiting for his teammates, who could more than handle themselves, the Pathfinder did as his title suggested and scouted ahead of the small group. He moved faster on his own, he always had. It had never been an issue before, it meant that he could report back to them and ensure they were ready for whatever they were about to walk into.

_‘Avi Avi Avi, commence, stars...’_

Avitus came to a hard stop at SAM’s words in his head. It had been a while since the damn AI had bothered him and it took him a moment to shake it off. He hated the stupid thing going off in his mind like that, especially in a time like this when he was wandering around in the jungle. With who knows what possibly watching him from the shadows.

With a little growl, off the main coms, he shook it off and kept moving. Another kilometer or so ahead it happened again.

_‘Avi Avi Avi, commence, stars...’_

He smacked the heel of his hand into the side of his helmet, trying to shut the damn thing up. He succeeded in shutting it up but also in giving himself a headache. He needed a distraction, so he called in to check on his squad. They were fine, about 250 meters back from his position.

All was well. So he kept on.

Another hundred meters forwards SAM went off again, and then again and again. It wouldn’t stop and this time there was discomfort associated with it, shooting darts of white hot pain behind his crest and Avitus stumbled to a stop against a nearby tree. He swore and held his hand against his helmet, uselessly trying to halt the pain.

 _“Rix, you alright?”_ That was Ted’s voice cutting through the constant deadman’s litany.

 _“Stay put. Coming to you._ ” Roor’sma came on next, her tone clipped as ever.

Within a few minutes the pair found him, he’d slid down to the jungle floor with his head between his hands and his helmet lying a few feet away where he’d tossed it. His gauntlet covered fingers were digging into the back of his head, and his eyes were shut tightly against the fresh wave of agony. He was silent though, able to withstand a fair amount of pain while remaining quiet. That might not necessarily have been a good thing in this case....

The salarian dropped to her knees in front of him while the krogan kept watch. She dug through her medical bag after scanning him and then jabbed him in the neck with a small needle. The pain receded quickly but along with it came a wave of nausea.

“Better?”

“Yeah… uhg... “ one hand fell to his stomach to apply pressure against the upset organ. “What the hell was that?”

“Appeared to be panic attack. Gave mild sedative. Feel better?”

Avitus nodded and carefully pulled himself up off the ground, water dripping down his faceplates without his helmet on to keep the rain out. Roor’sma passed him his helmet as she stood, and took a pace backwards to give him room. “We should get moving...”

“Should return to ship. Advise caution. Unknown cause. Potential for greater harm.”

“No.” He bit out, harsher than she deserved. “There’s a signal here, people may need our help.”

Ted started moving in the direction of the signal source, looking over his shoulder when he didn’t hear anyone following him. “Turian’s right. Better to find ‘em now. Might still be some alive if that signal is still on.”

Roor’sma made no further complaint beyond asking that they all stay together. The ex-Spectre aquiencessed to the request, only so that they’d be able to continue. It was… strange that his SAM had malfunctioned like that. It had never happened before, and it made him feel as though there was something else up.

Avitus attached his helmet to the mag lock on his hip and started moving again, following along behind Ted’s lumbering gait.

His mind caught, very briefly, on the possibility that it could be something to do with Macen for a moment before he shoved the thought deep down in his psyche. This wasn’t the time for hope, hope had only brought him misery in the past. He’d thought it was his partner sending him coordinates for the Natanus all those weeks ago when they’d found the dilapidated ark. His heart broken in two as he learned of what his mate had done in his last moments.

Avitus shook his head again, forcing the heartache away. He needed to focus.

\---

Macen Barro was laying fairly comfortably on his side watching the flickering wisps of fire coming out of the small pit in the middle of his makeshift shelter. His emerald gaze lost in the flame rather than in the downpour outside. He was mostly alone, just Dea sat beside him on the floor, but she was dozing. All of the others were out collecting firewood and scouting the nearby area for food.

It had been about two days since they’d managed to get their crystal-rectified radio working. Two of their scouts had found debris containing the final elements that they needed for the old-timey communications equipment to work the day prior to that. The group of seven planned to stay fairly nearby the camp for a week or so, if they hadn’t been rescued after that length of time, then they’d know the radio signal wasn’t strong enough.

Truly though… this was nearing their last hope.

If someone didn’t find them soon, then at the very least he wouldn’t make it through the next few days. They had no medications left to tend to his grievous injuries and food was dwindled to scraps. His Captain had made a valiant effort at keeping him alive, she’d done her best with what little they did have, but light was dwindling for him. Macen could feel himself slipping away.

_‘Brighter…’_

He was startled by the voice inside his head, his own voice. It had been a few days since SAM had last bothered to remind him of his last word to his mate. Macen took a breath and forced himself to relax back into the cot again. Shoulders going lax as he calmed. The AI was incomplete, there was nothing to be done about it.

But then there it was again, only this time... it hurt. There was a stabbing pain behind his eyes and he gasped loud enough to wake Dea. The Pathfinder’s hands went to his crest as he drew in a harsh breath through his teeth.

_‘Brighter… Brighter… Brighter…’_

The stupid thing was useless, spouting off his last word to his mate at random, seemingly just to torture him most of the time. But this was different. It had never hurt like this before…

“Barro!”

Macen fell out of his daze to see Captain Praeton shaking him by his shoulders. He realised he was screaming a moment later and forced the sound down with a groan. His talons had dug into his fringe as he’d tried to make the AI stop.

“What the hell was that?” she asked him once he opened his eyes again, seemingly coming back to normality after that agonizing moment.

“It… it was my SAM… ah… damn…” he slid a palm across his face, dragging a little blood along with it. He’d dug in hard to his fringe apparently. “It… it malfunctioned again. Worse than before.”

She gave him a hard look. Mandibles held in tightly to her cheeks. “You alright?”

“I don’t know...”

Dea handed him a canteen of water and helped him sit up to drink from it. Macen wasn’t even strong enough to do that anymore and his hands shook in hers as she helped him sip from the bottle. They didn’t have anything else to help, so he didn’t ask for more. She just laid him back down and moved outside to calm the others that had come to check in after his screams.

He hated this. Feeling helpless.

But it wouldn’t be long now, either the radio would work… or it wouldn’t. And he’d just have to find Avi with the Spirits.

\---

Avitus, Ted and Roor’sma kept moving through the thick underbrush of Havarl’s dense jungle. It was no wonder the angara hadn’t chosen this hemisphere, the trees were thicker and the weather somehow worse than near their settlement in the north. He almost wished he was back there, where he’d been stranded for weeks, before thinking better of it.

No. The ex-Spectre would much rather be _anywhere_ but there.

His teammates were bickering back and forth about what they should cook for dinner when they returned to the ship and Avitus let them chat. It helped him forget the AI shouting at him in his mind. It still hadn’t shut up completely. But at least with the sedative it was just a residual annoyance instead of the impossibly loud screeching it had been earlier. He’d have to get himself checked out on the Nexus. Maybe get rid of it if it was going to compromise him like that.

In this case he’d been in a safe location with his squad nearby, but that wouldn’t always be the case. More than enough times he’d fought the roekaar and the kett while searching out the lost souls of Ark Natanus.

It was hard to hear much through the rain as the trio neared the signal source, and he had to strain his senses to listen. Or it was... until a single sound made its way through the jungle. A scream.

The sound pierced through his head like a bullet. He knew that voice… it sounded just like...

_‘Macen.’_

Avitus’ neck lost all colour, going pale as he came to a shaky halt. The other two didn’t notice him stop and they kept moving, although they both pulled weapons from their backs. Roor’sma glanced back over her shoulder, “Pathfinder?”

“I know that voice.” His amber eyes were wide open, the size of saucers. His jaw hanging open in momentary shock, mandibles loose. “Spirits it can’t be....”

“Who, Rix?” Ted grunted.

The scream stopped and Avitus didn’t answer, instead he started running…

\---


	2. Chapter 2

\---

After Dea had left him alone, Macen curled into himself under the blankets. His eyes were shut tightly against the flames, they had been calming earlier but now they were just painful. Like everything else seemed to be lately. At least his hide didn’t burn so much now as it had after the Natanus incident. A few long breaths helped to take him away from the pain and he instead focused on the sound of the rain beating against the metal roof of the shelter.

Slow and even. Three seconds in, three seconds out.

It was something he used to do with Avitus. The older turian always seemed to get himself into trouble. Spectre missions had a habit of causing grievous injuries and more than once he’d personally been the one to patch him up. The memory brought a small smile to his face, his mandibles sliding into the easy expression. He didn’t smile nearly as much as he used to lately.

With Avi’s face imagined in his mind he slowly began to relax enough for sleep. The pull of darkness and quiet alluring as it would quiet his head. Maybe when he woke, SAM would be silent again. Just as he was about to drift off, something brought him back to wakefulness.

Through the constant din of the rain and the cracking of the fire, he heard a disturbance in the jungle. His green eyes snapped open to see Dea and one of the others grabbing their weapons up from their resting places and they moved to protect him.

The Captain was shouting orders… but there wasn’t a howl or groan in response as if it had been one of the planet’s native creatures… no. It had been a voice.

Macen’s heart nearly stopped in his chest.

He knew that voice.

_‘Avi…’_

\---

Avitus charged through the jungle. Heedless of the branches hitting him, uncaring of the fact he quickly left his squad far behind. The ex-Spectre needed to get to his mate, **_now_ **. He’d never been particularly objective when it came to Macen, and this moment of panic was no different.

He shouted ahead, his voice growing hoarse from it.

The new Pathfinder could see black, wet smoke coming up from a small encampment just a hundred meters ahead, and that’s when he finally slowed. His weapon somehow held tightly in his grip, despite not remembering taking the assault rifle off of his back. His heart hammered in his chest, breaths coming in ragged gasps from the near-kilometer long sprint through dense jungle.

Without stopping, he hit the identification command on his omnitool to broadcast his Nexus code. If anyone still had a working ‘tool then they’d see he was a friend on their ident systems. Just in case, he called out as well.

“This is Pathfinder Avitus Rix of the Andromeda Initiative, identify yourselves!” Somehow his voice was strong, unyielding against the pouring rain.

He continued forwards, stepping out from behind the treeline into a small clearing. There were three other turians staring at him, wide-eyed and bedraggled from what looked like a long few months of trying to survive. He recognized two of them immediately.

“Rix?” Captain Praeton’s voice was awed, her subvocal tones full of unkempt shock. Her weapon fell from her hands to the mossy ground. “Praise the Spirits…”

Avitus took one step forwards, he dropped the muzzle of his rifle to the jungle floor. His hands creaked for the pressure he was using to hold the metal, but training kept the gun in his hands.

“Captain, my team and I are here to take you home. How many are there?”

She blinked a few times, her mandibles fluttering against her cheeks. “Se.. seven… you’re really here...”

“Dea…” he used her first name to get her attention. He couldn’t wait any longer. He needed to know. “Where’s Macen?”

\---

Macen couldn’t breathe.

It was Avi. He was… he was here… standing just outside…

The retired Blackwatch agent tried to sit up as he heard the pounding of strong legs tumbling through the jungle stop. There was some yelling going on, and then nothing. He had to get up. His mate was outside, he’d come. And the thought nearly made him keen.

_‘I have to see him.’_

His hands shook as he forced himself into a sitting position on the cot, it had been a while since he’d managed it on his own. Next he moved his feet to the mossy floor of the shelter, it was damp under bare talons. The movement painful, but necessary. He _needed_ to get to Avitus.

Through the din of blood rushing in his aural cavities, one phrase stuck out. “Where’s Macen?” Avitus asked of the Captain, his voice was tight. He… he didn’t know that he was alive.

“Av.. Avi…” he coughed into the back of his hand and tried again. “Avi!”

“Macen!”

Dea was nearly pushed out of the way as the tall turian barrelled past her inside the shelter. Avitus didn’t stop, he moved without any of his usual grace and fell to his knees in front of the cot. Wet, armored arms were wrapped around his cowl. A damp face pressed into the side of his neck. All at once, Macen was home.

Maybe he would see the starlight, afterall.

\---


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two deserve to have a their happy ending written out. I'll be chipping away at this whenever the muse strikes.
> 
> Big thank you to DaddyVictus for naming Avitus' ship 'the Adtonitus'. It's a lovely latin word meaning any of the following: astonished, inspired, or lightning/thunder-struck. I thought it fitting.

\---

Relief at seeing his mate alive took the proverbial wind out of Avitus’ sails. 

Whatever it was that Roors’ma had given him to stop his SAM implant from malfunctioning had taken full effect once the adrenaline rush wore off. At present, he was seated on the makeshift cot at Macen’s side which the medic looked the injured turian over. He was feeling a little light-headed, mild nausea had settled over his stomach that only got worse when his mate’s damp bandages had been removed.

Macen was dying.

It was a miracle in itself that he’d survived this long. The scourge had torn his mate’s armour apart, that he knew from Macen’s last message, but what he hadn’t known was that his chest had been ripped to shreds along with it. His plates were deeply scarred, pockmarked, and infectious tissue could be easily picked out from what was still whole. In all his years as a Spectre, he hadn’t seen injuries quite like these. 

“Rix!” 

Avitus was pulled from his thoughts by Ted’s voice outside. Tiredness was banished for the moment in favour of work. The krogan wasn’t unkind in calling for him, yet it sounded urgent. As he stood up to investigate, Avitus gently squeezed his mate’s hand and pressed his crest to the male’s temple. They shared a brief look. Avitus’ asked for forgiveness at leaving, Macen’s said it was alright.

“Go, Pathfinder. Need to return to ship soon. More supplies there. Ted may have the _Adtonitus_ on comms.” Roors’ma’s voice was more clipped than usual.

“I’ll be right back,” he replied before heading back into the rain.

There were six turians outside; the three from earlier and the ones who must’ve been out scouting when his own team arrived. Dae was standing beside Ted, looking up at him with wide eyes. She, along with the rest of the turians, appeared to be in shock. The krogan had his omnitool out and was prodding it with his massive fingers.

“There you are,” Ted greeted him a little less gruffly than Avitus was used to. “Got Warren on comms. Faint. But I have her.”

Nodding, the Pathfinder raised a hand to his own comm unit and waited for the static to settle before speaking. “ _Adtonitus_ , this is Rix. Go ahead.”

_ “Rix. Weather int--- comms. Found evac--- one-six-kilometres to---. Over.” _

Internally he swore. Sixteen kilometres was going to be one hell of a hike. Avitus looked towards Dae. “Is there a clearing any closer to here?”

The expression on her face told him all he needed to know.

Into his comm unit, he replied to Warren’s message slowly and deliberately. “Understood. Relay coordinates. Medical assistance required. Send SOS to nearest angara settlement. Shuttle evac requested. Over.”

His pilot came back swiftly, repeating his message back to ensure she got it in its entirety. The Pathfinder confirmed her relay and tuned back into the world around him. Seven pairs of eyes watched him with rapt attention. Not for the first time, Avitus was reminded of why he hated being the one in charge.

The plan was simple. They’d start hiking towards the evacuation site immediately. In the worst case scenario, it would take them about five hours of walking through the dense jungle to get there. If Warren and the rest of his crew managed to locate a shuttle, they’d be all that much closer to the _Adtonitus_.

Captain Praeton fell into an easy secondary position behind him, taking his orders without question. And while Avitus returned to check on Macen, she prepared her team for the journey. There wasn’t much they needed to bring along with them, and the site could be destroyed at a later date if the new Council thought it prudent so it didn’t take them long. There was enough time for Ted to distribute ration bars for the shipwrecked turians to demolish while they waited for Roors’ma to finish with Macen.

When Avitus entered the shelter, his mate was lying down on the cot with his eyes closed. They fluttered open at the sound of his approach, yet they weren’t as clear as they had been before. While that glassy-eyed look might’ve concerned him normally, the looseness of Macen’s body showed the cause was nothing more than a heavy dose of pain medication. It was probably the first relief he’d had in weeks if his recollection of the escape pod supplies was correct.

“Avi. Hey...” Macen’s voice was slurred. It was as tired as the rest of him.

The ex-Spectre put on a brave face and gave him a small smile. “Right here. How’re we doing?” the question was more for his shipmate, but Macen replied regardless.

“Sleepy. Wanted to see ya first.”

“Pathfinder…” Roors’ma stood up from her charge, drawing Avitus’ attention away from his mate and back to her. Her expression was pinched. Salarian eyes were so expressive being as large as they were. “Barro requires intensive medical care. More than can do here. More than can do on ship. Need to be on Nexus immediately.”

“That’s where we’re going,” he told them both with determination. Macen had made it this far alone, now he could help bear the burden. “The rest of the team is preparing for the hike to the evacuation site.”

The salarian hummed in understanding, looking between the pair for a moment before resettling on her Pathfinder. “Will need to be carried. Stretcher too cold with rain. Must be kept warm. How far?”

“Sixteen kilometres.”

Roors’ma flinched at the number. “Too far. Weather won’t let up. Hm. No shuttle on the ship. Only option-”

“I’ll carry him, Roors’ma.” Rix cut off her tirade before she could spiral further. “It’s fine.”

But she shook her head, vehemently disagreeing with him. “Ted will carry. Sedative used earlier will make you too weak for extended excursion. Need you sharp for command.”

If the circumstances were anything close to normal, Avitus would have refused and overruled her. But when he glanced towards his mate, he knew that now wasn’t the time. The ex-Spectre needed to trust in his team. So instead he agreed and asked the medic to fetch Ted. At the least, he and Macen could have a moment alone before they departed.

Barely a moment after Roors’ma passed Avitus, he dropped to his knees beside the cot. His face pressed into his mate’s shoulder where he saw no bandages. Macen’s entire torso had been wrapped with white gauze, from the middle of his waist up the left side of his body and to his neck. He reeked of medigel and sickness.

“I’m so Spirits damned sorry, hun. I should’ve... I mean if I’d a known-”

\---

Avitus cut off when Macen’s hand found his. 

“You’d’ve been here in an instant. I know.” Even though the fogginess it was endearing to see Avi floundering. The older turian had never been good with his emotions. They’d been together for years in secret, repressing emotion was his strong suit, not displaying it. “Come here.”

Macen’s grip was weak, yet his mate came easily into his space. The feeling of calm that came over the ex-Blackwatch agent at feeling Avi’s crest on his own was palpable. Just as much as the adoring hum he felt reverberating in the leaky shelter.

“Never thought I’d get to do this again,” Avitus breathed, his tone low and honest. It wasn’t until the sound of heavy footsteps appeared behind him, that he pulled away to stand. With one last squeeze, he let go. “Now, lemme get ya home.”

“Home?” Macen replied hopefully, foggy-emerald eyes opened to stare into his love’s waiting amber ones.

Avi grinned down at him before turning away to greet the newcomer. “Course. It’ll finally be a home ‘cause you’re there, hun.”

Before the injured turian could fully process the mention of a home, the pair were met with a krogan. A rather large krogan to be more precise. Avi introduced him as ‘Ted,’ the ship’s mechanic. He was carrying the ruined armour that Macen had worn on the Natanus. 

Avitus helped him put it on, and Spirits did it hurt. The weight pressed against the raw places on his hide and it almost felt like the metal plates were crushing his chest. It was difficult to breathe, but at least somewhat manageable. 

Or… it was until Ted picked him up.

For the first time in a long time, Macen was glad his stomach was empty. The wave of nausea that hit him had no outlet and he saw stars. It was Avi that pulled him back to the present, a warm hum and the feeling of a comforting palm on his cheek.

By the time the pain ebbed enough for him to see, his mate had lost all pretense of stoicism. Avi was there at his side when the medic came to check on him and he didn’t dare let go of his hand until it was time to leave.

“Ready, Barro?” Roors’ma asked as she moved out of his line of sight. He hummed an affirmative in reply. Too shaky to trust his own voice for the moment. “Good. Ted, will keep the field up as long as I can. Slow and steady.”

“Right,” Ted barked as he sidled over to the edge of the cot. “Just keep the tingles to yourself.”

Macen would have normally asked what that meant, but the answer became quite apparent when a biotic aura appeared above them and he felt the krogan shift to accommodate an additional load on his back.

The salarian was riding the krogan. Now he’d seen everything.

While the other turians in the group were surprised, Avitus seemed to pay his squadmates no mind. That made Macen more curious than the act did in the first place. His Avi would have balked at the idea. Just how much had changed in the past few months, he didn’t know.

For the moment though, as they began to walk, Macen let himself drift off. He was warm and mostly dry for the first time in months.

He was going home.

\---


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I've made one or two minor edits in chapter 3 for continuity's sake. Macen is wearing his broken chestplate and is not wrapped up in a blanket.
> 
> I cannot thank [**Erikaskerzz**](http://erikaskerzz.tumblr.com) (on Tumblr) enough for the wonderful art piece. Before now, they'd never drawn for Mass Effect and it is absolutely gorgeous. I hope you all love it as much as I do!
> 
> [ **Art Link**](https://erikaskerzz.tumblr.com/post/175884333906/for-the-lovely-angelwingsl3-a-scene-from-their).
> 
> To my wonderful beta, [**Some_Writer**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/some_writer/pseuds/Some_writer). This chapter wouldn't been done proper justice without your help. Thank you!

\---

From the front of the pack, Avitus lead his squad and the small team of turians towards the promise of rescue. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t where he wanted to be -in the middle, carrying his mate- because as Pathfinder, it was his job to lead. He had to keep them safe and complete the mission.

Even without the added weight of Macen in his arms, he was tiring fast and they still had a long way to go.

For the first hour, they managed to follow along in one of the paths that Dae and her crew had cut into the thick underbrush. Once they were through the first few kilometres, the pathways started to become less worn as the jungle took over. Avitus’ booted feet felt far too heavy the longer they hiked. SAM was silent in his head which made the added weight worthwhile.

Avitus picked up his pace to scout ahead over a ridge, at the top, he paused and took a moment to glance back at the rest of the team. Weariness was showing on their plates but underneath it, he could see the determination in the set of their mandibles and the hardness of their eyes. They were ready to get off this Spirits forsaken rock. Avitus didn’t blame them, he hated Havarl more than most.

Avitus let his eyes land on Macen for the barest of moments. The sight should have made him smile if the situation hadn’t been so dire it would have been comical. A krogan carrying a turian in his arms, with a salarian riding on his back, who was projecting a biotic barrier above their heads like an umbrella.

Macen would have laughed. Avitus couldn’t. His mind was still reeling.

His mate was alive. It made his heart beat so fast in his chest, he almost asked for another sedative just to make it stop. The endless guilt and regret and loss was eating away at him, now more than ever. He’d left Macen dying alone on Havarl for months. For literal months, his mate lay clinging to life in this endless rain while he was busy galavanting across the new galaxy playing at Macen’s dream. Avitus hated himself for it. He hated himself for each moment he hadn’t spent searching and for almost giving it all up.

What he wanted to do was go back and check on them. Ensure that Roors’ma was holding out all right with her barrier, and make sure that Ted wasn’t tiring too quick with the added weight of his two tagalongs. But mostly Avitus wanted to make sure that Macen was still sleeping soundly. At the least, he deserved that.

A shoulder clinking against his own pulled the Pathfinder out of his daze. It was Dae. She wasn’t wearing a helmet so he could see her eyes as she fixed him with a hard stare. It wasn’t unkind, but it did make him feel a little out of his depth. In all the months he’d known her before the journey to Andromeda, he’d never seen that expression on her face.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” she asked him, keeping her voice low enough to not be heard over the din of the rain against his hardsuit.

Avitus shook his head, dragging his attention away from the glowing biotic energy above his mate to admit: “Too much.”

Dae’s mandibles flickered into an amused smile. It wasn’t a frequent look on her plates, she was usually the serious type. A good turian by all counts. Her steadfastness and natural leadership skills made her the ideal Captain for the _Natanus_. She’d never quite been a friend but there was always a sense of comradery between them. At this moment, he needed it.

“Let’s just focus on getting out of here, hm?”

“Right.” Avitus gave her a sharp nod before turning back towards their path.

\---

Avitus had always hated the rain on Havarl. It was quiet other than the constant din. It drowned out their footsteps and any possible sounds from approaching predators. He kept a scan going on his omnitool, it would only be useful to a range of thirty metres or so as heat signatures from the wildlife were generally lost in the foliage beyond that distance but it couldn’t hurt.

Night was beginning to fall too. Not that it would be very noticeable through the thick cloud layer and the eerie glow of the local vegetation. The group was coming up to the halfway point in their journey, and it was as good a time as any to stop for a moment to rest.

When he looked back to check on the group the spacing had gotten too large, a sure sign that his pace was too quick. Turians were not an endurance species, the entire group was starting to slow. He might’ve had sedatives running through his bloodstream, but he was working off a full night’s rest and a regular caloric intake. The others were not.

Roors’ma was exhausted too, it was easy to see from how the barrier had reduced in size since they started hiking. Her amp would need twenty minutes to cool, and the others could use the time to get more food into their stomachs.

“We’ll stop here,” he called out while raising his arm in the standard Hierarchy signal for halt. “Thirty minutes. I know its wet, but stay hydrated.”

A chorus of ‘yessirs’ hit his aural canals before he heard Dae tell two of her turians to keep first watch. She flicked her crest towards Macen and went about distributing ration bars to her team.

Avitus pulled up his omnitool as he walked over to Ted and the others. One of the turians not tasked with keeping watch, Rubrum if Avitus remembered correctly, had already climbed into the nearest tree with low branches and set out a tarp to help protect Macen from the rain.

It wasn’t as good as the biotic barrier, but it would do well enough to give his salarian teammate a rest. A power nap and a ration bar would have her ready to go in no time.

As soon as the tarp was in place Roors’ma dropped her biotics and collapsed against Ted’s back. She was breathing hard and her eyes were pinched closed in a wince.

“You overextended,” Avitus stated, blunt in his assessment.

Ted started to grumble something unintelligible but stopped when his salarian friend tapped his shoulder and mumbled quit it before hopping down from her perch. The krogan merely grunted in agreement and looked to Avitus for direction. “Want to take him?”

He wanted to. He really did. But the mission had to come first.

“I’ve got to get the _Adtonitus_ on comms,” Avitus told him.

“Just for a minute then?” Ted argued back, appearing to be waffling over his reasoning before he said to hell with it and, blunt as ever: “I’ve got to take a piss.”

Avitus snorted. Honest to the Spirits, snorted. Ted glared and gestured with the injured turian in his arms like how one would offer a fledgling.

“Must keep warm,” Roors’ma mumbled sleepily from her lean against the tree as Avitus reached out for his mate.

The Pathfinder dropped his chest-plate and gloves in an instant to try and keep the worst of the water away. It wasn’t perfect, but the medic’s lethargic yawn of approval was good enough for him. After removing Macen’s chest plate as well, he took him against his chest and sat underneath the tarp, mostly out of the rain. His mate didn’t stir. He was unconscious, which was probably for the best. It couldn’t have been comfortable getting jostled around as they hiked through the jungle for hours on end.

Avitus knew that his mate had lost weight, but having him in his arms gave him a sense of just how thin Macen had become. He was too light. Fragile. It scared the ex-Spectre more than anything else in his life had ever managed to in the past.

Despite the others watching him, he couldn’t help himself from touching Macen’s face. Running a single talon along the hard edge of his mate’s mandible helped to ground himself. Macen always grounded him when he spiralled out. Regardless of the fact that the ex-Spectre was the more serious of the pair, the more secretive and reclusive too, it was the more upbeat Macen that kept him in touch with reality.

Even the darkest days couldn’t take away his light.

\---

Getting underway was difficult.

After Ted had returned, and Avitus reluctantly gave over his charge, the Pathfinder had contacted his ship. Their connection was still poor, yet better than when they’d been further away. Maybe a three out of five instead of a two on the readability scale. There was good news and bad.

The good news was that a shuttle was on its way from an angaran research post and it would meet with them within the hour. The bad news was, for whatever reason, the only shuttle that the research centre could afford to send was a laughably small thing, only capable of carrying two passengers at a time. It was probably a survey vessel, designed only for a pilot and a spotter to ride in.

He and Dae discussed waiting where they were to be taken back to the ship in shifts, but ultimately decided against it. By the time they’d shifted through everyone, the six additional  _Natanus_ crewmembers plus him and his team, they could have already been back at the ship. Ted might not even fit. So starting to move again now would mean that the shuttle would get Macen and Roor’sma back to the ship along with one or possibly two additional trips afterwards.

Without Macen they could go faster. As much as Avitus hated letting his mate out of his sight, it was the right move. Macen needed medical care as soon as possible, Avitus needed to keep the refugees safe.

“Stay close, you’re almost through this,” Avitus reassured the group as they got underway. A feeling beneath his plates made him continue with a more Macen-like statement. “Hot meals and a view of the stars when we get there.”

Ted barked out a laugh. “Getting romantic on us, Pathfinder?”

The turian gave him a non-committal flick of his mandible and turned away, back towards the pathway that would lead them to the _Adtonitus_. The rain had let up some and the trees were beginning to thin, both of which made the trek easier. It was a welcomed change for everyone involved and the promise of rescue approaching only made them move faster.

Avitus let his mind drift as they continued their journey. He was still quite cognizant of his surroundings, but the promise of seeing the stars brought his thoughts back to Macen’s question from eons ago: ‘Will the stars look different?’

Silently, he considered the question. They were different scientifically speaking in location and relative size accounting for the passage of more than 600 years in time. Yet from a distance, the skies were still littered with sparkling dots, he’d seen them from the surface of Eos and from the bridge of the _Adtonitus_. In that way, they weren’t so different at all. Perhaps not as bright, but that could also have been his perspective.

With Macen alive, perhaps they would be brighter as he’d told him all those years ago….

A loud ping in his aural implant dragged the Pathfinder back to attention, there was only one thing that made an alarm like that: Hostiles. His assault rifle was in his hands before he knew where to direct his attention, years of practice as a Spectre and before that for the Hierarchy had honed his skills well.

Avitus scanned the area, his eyes catching on a space about ten metres away from where the rain wasn’t hitting the jungle floor. “Challytion!” He called out to warn the rest of the team.

An array of reactions could be heard from behind him, they amounted to a slice of fear and a whole host of frustration. Weapons were drawn and the group crowded in, protecting Ted, Roors’ma and Macen in the centre without direction. Each of the turians had a weapon, some of them were from the _Natanus_ and the rest were borrowed from his squadmates.

A single beast began stalking towards them. When it charged forwards, Avitus took it down with prejudice. The challtyion rematerialized in a smoking heap from the onslaught, its camouflage rendered useless now that it was dead. The ex-Spectre remained on guard, watching for more of them. Like the aldi, challytions tended to travel in packs.

On the edge of Avitus’ hearing, the sound of an engine came into range. The shuttle was almost there. The noise caused a stir in the underbrush and there were suddenly a lot more silhouettes moving towards them. He just needed to keep the area clear for Macen to be airlifted out.

That… he could manage.

Another burst of bullets took down the nearest creature and Avitus began calling out commands to the team. For the first time since arriving in Andromeda, he was thankful he’d gotten used to having a squad along with him. In the beginning, when he first clawed his way out of the escape pod, he would forget he had a squad to direct in firefights. Without leadership, turians weren’t nearly as efficient. He was too used to working alone, fighting for himself and no one else. That had changed without him realizing it.

Now, Avitus knew exactly how to handle a team.

As the shuttle grew closer, the group fended off the challytions together. Ted had taken cover behind a fallen tree and Roors’ma kept her barrier tight and strong around them. Taking the first wave of beasts down was quick and efficient. By the time the shuttle came into sight, they were a smoking mess and no longer a threat.

Just as the field was cleared and the turians called out in triumph a noise beyond the trees alerted Avitus to one more threat… he heard the roar before the others did, knowing exactly what it was, and yelled: “Take cover!”

In a mad dash, Avitus was just barely able to shove one of the turians out of the charging eiroch’s way. Eiroch tended to be followed by packs of challtyions. Where you found one, you’d be likely to find the other nearby. The massive creature roared as it missed them by a hair. The two of them skidded through the wet foliage to a stop a few feet away. It turned on them, pawing the ground.

“Pathfinder!” Roors’ma yelled from cover, “Watch yourself!”

Her warning seemed to have alerted the creature to her presence. Salarians looked a lot tastier to eiroch than turians and that was a big damn problem as the beast turned its focus on her. Avitus felt his heart drop into his stomach and managed to get out of the wet leaves and start shooting before it reached them.

He was too late to make it redirect its attention.

“Get out of the way!” Avitus shouted as he chased after the eiroch. When his clip ran hot, he ejected it and slammed another one home. A hailstorm of bullets from the others impacted its back but did nothing to stop it. The hide on an erioch’s back was armour-like in toughness, the best way to kill them was shots to their unprotected underbelly.

Ted shoved Macen at Roors’ma and took on the beast as it charged them, roaring as they clashed in the middle. Had the krogan not been 160 kilograms of solid muscle, he would have been a goner. Avitus sprinted across the field, taking shots only when he could ensure he wouldn’t hit his teammate.

“Get - RAH- him out of here!” the krogan snarled as he shoved the beast further away.

Looking between Macen and Ted, Avitus had to make a split-second decision. Ted could handle himself for a moment and Roors’ma could help if she wasn’t stuck underneath Macen. Mind made up, he slung his assault rifle over his shoulders and grabbed his mate, despite the cry of pain Macen let out. Avitus ignored it, too focused on getting him to safety to worry about his comfort. When Macen had woken up, he didn’t know. It could have been anytime from the start of the firefight until being thrown at his salarian teammate.

The sooner he got Macen clear, the faster he could help his squad. Jostling his mate was inevitable at the speed he was moving. Avitus hit the booster on his jump-jets to ensure they were clear and to skip over a few wet and fallen trees, he wasn’t always a fan of the tech but today he was thankful for it.

Avitus could feel Macen coughing against his chest and see a splash of cobalt mix into the rain just before he came skidding to a halt. He hated himself for causing more harm.

The angaran pilot had the door open and waiting for them.

As gently as possible, Avitus sat Macen down on the only available seat. His fingers flew over the straps of the safety harness, amber eyes not straying from the task of securing his mate as he spoke to the pilot. “Get him back to my ship as fast as you can.”

Once the belt was secured, he looked up at the pilot to confirm that she had heard him. The angara was wide-eyed and she looked half scared to death but after a hesitant nod, she agreed. Her hands flew across the controls, setting them up for a speedy getaway. Avitus started to pull back, turning back towards the fighting, he stopped at the feeling of one hand on the rim of his cowl.

“Av-Avi-” Macen whimpered. “Don’t go…”

The words were like a knife, stabbing into the softer hide under his carapace. Avitus’ heart clenched and his gaze snapped back to Macen’s foggy-green eyes. They were so wide, he was terrified. His Macen would never have held him back from his duties, but this wasn’t the same turian he’d sealed into a cryo-pod six-hundred years ago... how desperate he must have been to ask him to stay… it damn near broke his heart in two.

He pressed his crest to Macen’s for the briefest moment, maybe a little harder than intended as he hummed to his love through his second voice as pure as he could. Praying to the Spirits that it wouldn’t be the last time. “Be strong, my love.”

Avitus yanked himself away, yelling for the pilot to go as he slammed the door shut. He rushed back towards the fighting without looking back, he couldn’t bear to watch the skiff pull away. It hurt too much.

 

\---

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -VV


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with me all this time, I've loved writing Macen and Avitus' story so much. I hope you've enjoyed it too. 
> 
> I have to thank my beta, [**Some_Writer**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/some_writer/pseuds/Some_writer). You're amazing, thank you. 
> 
> Theme Music: [**Stars, by Skillet**](https://youtu.be/TbLJyjfyACM).

\---

Macen’s hand shook as he reached out to latch onto Avitus. The bare edges of his talons caught against the unforgiving metal of his mate’s cowl, making the elder male turn his head away from the fighting and back towards him. Inside his chest, his heart clenched. He couldn’t do this alone. Not when he’d just gotten him back.

“Av-Avi-” he whimpered.  “Don’t go…”

Watching Avitus’ expression fall, Macen felt his world splitting apart right in front of him. The way his mandibles fell slack. How his amber eyes pinched with worry. It made Macen regret saying anything at all. If it weren’t for the softening of his mate’s voice and the thump of a crest against his own, the retired Blackwatch agent wouldn’t have been able to withstand him pulling away.

“Be brave, my love.”

Macen’s hand fell to his side. The door slammed shut between them. 

All at once, reality set back in. Pain overtook the injured turian. He curled in on himself as much as the seat would allow. When the vehicle sped forwards, he lurched against the harness until the shitty inertial dampeners kicked in. It made his armour dig into his damaged hide and plates and his voice broke as he let out a keen. Everything  _ hurt _ . Avitus was  _ gone _ .

Had it not been for the soothing voice cooing at him from the front seat, Macen would have spent the entire trip locked inside his own head. Instead, the… he didn’t know what species… in the front seat dragged him out with their melodic voice.

It wasn’t like a turian song, the words were more direct, yet lighter. Out of the purple alien’s lips fell beautiful tones as they sang to him. It took Macen a handful of moments before he understood the words, they must have had a Milky Way translator or some kind of collaborative programming built into their own species’ version. A lullaby of some kind filled the tiny ship.

_ “- a diamond in the sky, twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are.” _

Macen blinked a couple times, the world coming back into focus. Bright purple eyes were looking back at him, a smile spread across her, at least he thought they were a her, face. Her eyes were sympathetic. Somehow the expression translated over the cosmos as the pale blue light from her console reflected off her skin. 

A vain thought crossed his mind, that this wasn’t how he wanted his first meeting with an alien species to go. As Pathfinder, he should have been reaching out in welcome instead of hiding away keening. It made him feel sicker to his stomach. His better nature demanded that he fix this.

“Wh-what was that?” Macen’s voice started out cracked and smoothed by the end of the sentence.

She hummed, seeming to be able to understand him as well, her shoulders dropping as she exhaled. The leather-like fabric of her seat shifted with her as she moved. “I learned it from one of the human scientists at the outpost. Was that the wrong way to sing it?”

“I’ve never heard it before,” Macen told her as he pulled in a sharp breath and adjusted himself. The seat wasn’t large enough for him, even tilted all the way back it was uncomfortable and he kept sliding down the grey fabric. His legs were cramped too, her species must be short comparatively speaking.

The alien turned back towards the front of the shuttle, her hands moving across the controls with practiced ease. As much as her words had been comforting, the easy way in which she handled the shuttle calmed him too. “I was afraid I’d upset you more, but I didn’t know what to do. I’m sorry.”

Macen shook his head, wiping the blood from his chin with the back of one hand. “No, I’m the one who’s sorry. I... ” he stopped, waffling over how to describe his situation. He didn’t know her, even know her species, and yet… here she was helping him. He felt warm inside like he hadn’t since arriving in Andromeda. “I just… Thank you.”

“Are you alright? I don’t have any medical supplies for your species aboard.” Again, she turned back to look at him, this time her face pinched together with worry too. Just like Avi’s had been. He must really look terrible.

Macen opened his mouth to reply and fell short. His mandibles fluttered as he stumbled over his words. His eyes trailed down his chest taking in the ruined and warped metal, dotted with wet streaks of blood. He really wasn’t all right.

“My name’s Samways… Sammy… what’s yours?” The alien had gone back to her controls, her voice light again as she attempted to distract him. Shadows passed over his face, it was dim in the shuttlecraft and only lit by the pale blue of her console, the lower light was calming.

“Macen,” he said.

She, Sammy, glanced back over her shoulder, smiling at him. “It’s nice to meet you, Macen. Not far now. Just hold on a few more minutes.”

Macen’s eyes clamped shut as he rode out a wave of pain when the ship hit a small patch of turbulence. Sammy turned back to the console and apologized profusely, but he brushed her off. Turbulence wasn’t her fault, it was expected at a low level and in cloud. 

What the Pathfinder needed was a distraction. “I’m sorry,” he began, clearing his throat. “I’ve never met your species. What are you?”

“Oh! I thought everyone had met the angara by now. I’m angaran, we’re on the planet Havarl. Did you know that?”

He shook his head. “No.”

“I’m from an outpost to the North. A little over ten thousand kilometres from here, give or take a few hundred. The only reason I got here so fast is that I’m on a survey mission, plotting the geography in the south,” on the console in front of her, she zoomed out on the map showing him where the outpost was and where they were now. Then Sammy pointed out the space she had been working in, it missed the encampment by a solid five hundred kilometres. Her words hit him like a charging krogan. There had been people here all along. His team had been scraping by, only just surviving for weeks on end, and there had been a population here that they couldn’t reach. 

“Have you been here long?” Sammy asked. When he didn’t reply, she said: “I’ve upset you again, haven’t I?”

Macen forced the keen away. Avitus had told him to be brave, so he would no matter how difficult. “Two months, maybe a little more? I’m not sure.” He adjusted in the seat again, wincing as he forced himself to sit up higher. “You said a human taught you that song?”

“Yes! She’s one of the first scientists I met from your galaxy.”

Breath caught in Macen’s throat. He hadn’t had time to ask Avitus, nor been awake to ask the others. All Macen knew was that at least the  _ Natanus  _ had made it to Andromeda. He guessed the  _ Nexus  _ had too, otherwise, there wouldn’t have been krogan or salarians with Avi. “Did she say what ship she came on?”

“Hmm… she did, just let me think. There were so many...”

“Many?” he prompted, curiosity getting the better of him. The belt pushed his armour into his plates again and he grit his teeth. Green eyes brightened with excitement, losing some of the fogginess that had settled over his gaze in the past few hours.

Sammy hummed in consideration again, her hands rising to count through the ships on her fingertips. “The  _ Nexus  _ has been here for a while, over a year for certain… then there’s the  _ Hyperion _ ,  _ Leusinia _ ,  _ Natanus _ , and  _ Paarchero _ .”

Happiness welled up inside of Macen, they’d really made it. A drawn-out whoosh of air exited his lungs and he laughed, honestly laughed for what felt like the first time in months. “We did it.”

The angara giggled right along with him as she started slowing the ship. “I’m pleased I could bring you happiness, Macen. We’re just about to your… uh… friend’s? ship.”

“Mate,” Macen corrected once he’d calmed down. “Avi… Avitus is my mate.”

“Oh! And he found you all the way out here. How romantic!”

He couldn’t stop the small smirk from spreading across his mandibles. Sammy was right, it was pretty damn romantic. His stoic Avi, searching the new galaxy for him. Taking up the mantle of Pathfinder. Working with the other species and leading a team. “Yeah, it is.”

“Well, I hope you find happiness here. Welcome to Andromeda.”

\---

Avitus came to an abrupt halt when his shoulder impacted the eiroch, knocking it off balance and allowing Ted to gain the upper hand. His krogan teammate managed to ground the beast with one of his massive hands and the muzzle of the Pathfinder’s assault rifle found its way down to its chest.

Emptying a full clip into the eiroch caused it to stop moving, a second one ensured it would never rise again. Ted roared his triumph, his left arm rising above his head as he cheered while his right remained limp as his side. The bright orange colour of krogan blood leaked out from the torn hole in his armour, Ted’s shoulder guard was missing.  _ ‘Probably eaten by the eiroch,’ _ Avitus mused darkly.

Chest heaving, the retired Spectre pulled away too. Though he didn’t cheer. Instead, he brought up his omnitool and performed a full scan of the area. His shoulders rose and fell, the rain had returned in force and it trailed down his plates washing Macen’s blood, and regretfully his scent, off of the armour plates.

“We’re clear!”

The squad regrouped, stowed their weapons and got ready to move again. He wasn’t injured, neither was anyone else, besides Ted and the krogan sounded pleased with his new scars. Roors’ma fussed over him before they started hiking again.

Avitus’ mandibles clamped down tight against his jaw, his gaze fixed itself on the trees ahead of them as he started leading the group onwards. Faster this time. Without… without Macen, they could move quicker. Get back to the  _ Adtonitus  _ that much sooner.

He hated it.

For the first ten minutes, not a sound came from the team other than boots passing over the mud-slicked terrain. Rain pelted down against the leaves above them and louder still against the metal of his armour. The constant din helped to drown out his traitorous thoughts, that Macen somehow wouldn’t make it back to the ship alive. That the angara would steal him away, let him die. His breaths sped and the ache behind his eyes returned.

Avitus wasn’t sure if SAM had started yelling at him again, or if he was imagining it. 

_ ‘Avi Avi Avi, commence, stars...’ _

One of his hands rose to pinch at the bridge of his nasal plates. His golden eyes slammed shut for a moment and he barely caught himself against the trunk of a downed tree before he stumbled. The bark was slippery under his gauntlet, his mind on fire.

“Rix, you okay?” Dae had caught up to him.

Torn from his mind and dragged back to the world around him, Avitus grunted an affirmative tone. He shoved himself back to full height, spine tightened like a bowstring ready to fire. “Fine.”

She made a disbelieving huff, yet followed him as he continued forward. He couldn’t stop now. Not when Macen was waiting for him, it was only a few more kilometres. Just another two hours at their renewed pace.

When engine noise finally became loud enough to hear over the downpour, Avitus stopped the group again by raising his arm in the Hierarchy standard signal for stop. All but Ted halted immediately, the krogan took an extra few steps before realizing what the signal meant. Had the Pathfinder been in his right mind, he’d have used the interspecies signal instead. Old habits ran deep, coming out when he least expected them to.

Turning around, his golden gaze travelled across the refugees, as he tried to figure out which of them looked the worse for wear. Each bore signs of exhaustion, yet not one put up their fist to volunteer. None of them would… they were turian. It wasn’t in their nature.

“You should go, Rix,” Dae said, her voice barely above a whisper as she stepped up to his side again. She was doing the same thing, surveying her troops. Not one of them stood out to her either. “Your krogan is too large for the ship. No one else needs medical attention.”

He shook his head, gritting his teeth. “I can’t.”

“Go to your mate,” her voice had changed, Dae going away and Captain Praeton coming out.

The words felt like ice in his gizzard. A wave of guilt so great he could barely breathe weighed down his carapace. He wanted to… damn it, he did. But he had a mission to complete. His priority as Pathfinder was to get the entire group to safety. This wasn’t simply about saving Macen anymore, he had a responsibility to bring the crew of the  _ Natanus  _ home.

“You go,” he snapped and before she could argue, he turned his gaze on her. That amber gaze of his pled for what his words couldn’t possibly express. “Please just go, Dae. I have to do this.”

For a brief moment, it looked like she might argue further. But she didn’t. Instead, the Captain nodded once, sharp and precise, before striding over to her team and putting the extra ration bar she was carrying into one of the other turian’s hands. “I’ll see you on the ship,” she told them.

The crew all hummed a farewell. A happy sound, one full of promise for they would see her again soon. One that said they would be away from Havarl soon. Warm and dry.

Avitus bled his gums watching her board the shuttle, the cobalt stained seat in the back made his gut twist. He wrenched himself away and turned towards their path, unable to watch it rise and disappear into the cloud layer.

He needed to get home. He needed to get to Macen.

\---

Bright green eyes went wide as the shuttle door opened up to Avitus’ ship. Macen had seen schematics for the Pathfinder fleet but had never had the chance to view one of them in person. Initially, he’d regretted that fact. But now, seeing it for the first time, the astonishment was worth the wait. The vibration of interest and amazement made Sammy giggle from her seat up front as she completed her post-flight checks.

A turian and an asari met Sammy as she bounced out of her skiff. The turian was taller than average, a female with blue eyes the colour of the oceans on Thessia and a stiff, militaristic demeanour that was common in Hierarchy lifers. The asari was tall too, she had violet skin and eyes to match. Blue markings swept out from her eyes, delicately extenuating the curve of her high cheekbones. While the turian wore the standard fatigues of an Andromeda ship hand, the asari had a doctor’s jacket pulled over her shoulders.

A real medical bay sounded like a dream at the moment, a damn welcomed dream.

“Pardon me if I don’t get up,” he tried for a smile, one of his hands clumsily started to undo the harness clasp keeping him in place. 

“It’s quite alright, Barro. Help’s here,” the turian said with a warm thrum of her second voice while the asari pulled out her omnitool and began a scan of him. “Hang on a few minutes and we’ll get you out of there.”

“I’m Doctor Sharma B’ataya,” the asari told him, her thin lips upturned in a smile and her eyes were soft as she met his gaze. “This is Navigator Telaxis, she’s Pathfinder Rix’s second.”

Nodding, Macen let out a long sigh. “Pathfinder Rix…” he shook his head. “Still can’t wrap my head around that one.”

A trill of amusement from Telaxis was quickly stifled. “Sorry… he’d say the same.”

With the use of her biotics, the doctor lifted him out of the shuttle and onto a waiting stretcher. Sammy said goodbye to him, wished him well and headed back to pick up more of his crew members. It wouldn’t be long now before everyone was safe on the  _ Adtonitus _ . Until Avi was safe and back in his arms.

Rix’s crew brought Macen to the medical bay where the doctor got him settled onto one of the beds, of which there were three. A desk sat at one of the room, multiple cabinets and screens lined the free space on the other walls. It appeared to be fully stocked, dextro of levo as required.

For a handful of minutes, Telaxis remained to help remove the heavy plates of his armour. She was able to find the seals more easily than her asari teammate would have been able to alone. As the doctor assessed him, it was clear she was quite familiar with turian physiology. Somehow knowing just how to treat the burn-like wounds across his hide, with a touch that spoke of personal experience. Silently, he prayed that many others hadn’t been hit by whatever it was that hit the  _ Natanus _ .

Through the tiredness sinking into his bones, Macen tried to take in as much as possible. Not simply the fact he was warm and dry, but how the lighting was dim enough to keep a turian calm and bright enough for a salarian to still work by. How the sleek turian lines melded into asari styled fixtures. How the crew members both on and off the ship had worked together in tandem.

This was the Andromeda he’d wished for.

Over the course of the next…  _ he didn’t know how long _ … the doctor completed a full workup. She had him clean, bandaged and hooked up to more machines than his exhausted mind could handle.

When the door slid open, his wandering attention found a target. “Av-” he cut off. Much to his disappointment, it wasn’t his mate. Instead, it was Dae that walked in through the doorway. Her expression softened, mandibles loosening from the worried state they were in before she saw him.

“Soon, Barro. He’ll be here soon.”

\---

Two hours later, Avitus could see the  _ Adtonitus’  _ shadow becoming visible through the trees. His heart sped under his cowl, so close to Macen yet so far still. He needed to be there now. When the pilot had returned, she’d brought news of his mate. Macen had been doing well thus far and he’d sent Roors’ma back to the ship next. The salarian was best equipped to help Doctor B’aytaya with anything she might need. 

Avitus was determined to give Macen every edge he could. He deserved more, but for the moment it was all he could do.

No matter how much he wanted to be with him, he needed to be here more. Getting the team to safety. Now, with the ship in sight, the pull was nearly unbearable. His mandibles tightened against his jaw and he held down a keen. The others didn’t need to hear that, not when they were so close to the finishing line. Avitus was so caught up that he didn’t notice as Ted approached him.

The ex-Spectre flinched away from the hand that came down on his shoulder.

Ted just chuckled at him, waving out towards the ship. “Go on, Pathfinder,” he said. “I think I’ve got it from here.”

Looking between the massive krogan and the silhouette, Avitus’ hand tightened around the grip of his rifle. Everything should be fine… but they weren’t back yet. “Not yet,” he told them.

But the crew wasn’t having any of it. 

“Go on!”

“Rix, get your ass moving!”

“Go!”

“Come on, Rix. Barro’s waiting.”

His gaze travelled across the rest of them. Their shouts echoing through Havarl’s forest, surely if there was anything waiting for them in the underbrush it would have attacked them by now or runoff. Water flew off his crest at the sharpness of his nod. His chest felt tight with gratitude.

Trills of joy and well wishes followed him as he sprinted to the  _ Adtonitus _ . 

Wet underbrush made his boots slip, only determination kept the Pathfinder on his feet. Around him the trees whipped by, the ship growing ever closer. His omnitool was silent, not a single hostile appeared before him. By the time he reached the gangplank, Avitus was uncharacteristically out of breath.

Telaxis waited for him, an assault rifle held loose in her hands as she leaned back into her hip. The appearance was deceptive, he trusted the Navigator with his life and she was on high alert. As he passed her, she gave him a hum of welcome. They didn’t need to speak, he knew she was supportive of his decision to run ahead.

Avitus risked a glance back, the rest of them were just becoming visible through the treeline. They were safe. He was only a minute or two ahead. Telaxis would call for him if needed, the comms on the ship worked just fine.

Without needing to think about it, his feet brought him through the cargo bay towards the medical suite, heedless of the mud and water he trailed behind him. Cleaning it up could come later, all that mattered now was getting to Macen.

The door slid open at his approach, Dae stepping out into the hall with a relieved expression on her face. Welcome, and happiness oozed from her voice after a soft sigh. “He’s waiting for you,” she said.

Avitus felt his chest tighten with the words. It was finally over, the waiting… the heartbreak. Macen was here.

+-+-+-

The world felt foggy around him as Macen waited, nervous energy pulling at his hide. It had only been a few minutes since the pilot had radioed to tell them that the crew was in sight. Not even in the darkest days of being stranded had time gone by this slowly. 

It felt like an eternity before Dae left his side to greet Avitus.

The doctor, who insisted he called her by her first name, Sharma, had propped him up on a bunch of pillows to help his wounds drain. It was comfortable enough, far more than the stiff cot had been for weeks on end in the forest. He must have looked a mess, bandages covering his entire right side from neck to hip and across his chest. Tubes and wires seemed to be almost haphazardly placed in his arms and over his keel respectively. A stark white sheet had been pulled up over his hips, and a heating pad sat beneath him along the line of his back to keep him warm.

This wasn’t how he wanted Avitus to see him.

There was nothing to be done for it now because here he was. “He’s waiting for you,” Dae said.

A bare moment passed before a soaking wet turian,  _ his  _ soaking wet turian, pushed past her and entered the room. The joy in his face was unmistakable, his mandibles were spread wide into a smile and his crest was tilted to the side. Though, it was the eyes that said it all.

Avitus’ golden gaze didn’t care to look at anything other than his own green irises.

Quietly, the room was vacated. No one waited to see what happened next and it wasn’t until the door closed that Avitus made a move. His armour quickly met the floor, making an awful racket at its fall. Had it been another time and place, Macen might have flinched for the noise. Instead, he reached out his good arm, the left, and let out a needy noise. Avitus dropped to his knees at the side of the medical bed. Stripped of his armour from the waist up, Macen immediately noticed scars in places where there weren't any before, but that was an exploration for a different time.

Macen touched his face, holding onto him for strength. He couldn't help the shaky breath that left him when he felt the weight of Avitus’ head as he pressed his cheek into his fumbling palm. The trembling steadied somewhat when his mate gripped his hand with both of his own, their gazes never parting from one another’s.

Time passed in a flash.

When Macen thought about it later, he would realize that they were like that for a long time. Yet, at the moment it barely felt like any time at all. Avitus was stiff as he pushed himself up to stand, his joints creaking and a groan of discomfort falling from his maw at the jarring movement.

Macen was too late to school the disappointment from his face, a mistake that wouldn't go unnoticed by the ex-Spectre. “Not leaving you,” Avi assured, his mandibles lifted in a gentle smile.

Macen nodded once, untrusting of his own voice, before letting go of the death grip he was keeping on the elder male’s hand.

Avitus stayed within sight at all times, just drying himself off with a towel from one of the cabinets and tidying his mess of armour before returning to the bed. He sat down on the edge, almost hesitant now. As though he was afraid that he’d break him.

“Please?” Macen sidled over a little, giving Avitus room to lie down. He wanted it, he wanted so badly for the contact. It had been too Spirits-damned long. 

Maybe it had been for Avi too because his voice dropped to a whisper as he said: “Of course, love.” and then carefully moulded his body around Macen’s. Each move he made was calculated and careful not to jostle him.

Once he settled, Avitus began a warm rumbling tone from deep in his chest. Not unlike a lullaby in its own right, though there were no words. The simple purr filled the space between them. Macen’s eyes shut softly as he felt Avi’s crest descend to his left shoulder. All the worry and the pain evaporated at that moment. He was home.

Warm and safe, Macen let himself sleep. The promise of better days ahead of him.

\---

By the time Doctor B’ataya returned, Macen had fallen into a deep sleep. Avitus kept his rumbling purr going regardless, it was as much for his mate’s comfort as his own. It had been a long time since he’d had the ability to vocalize anything but heartache, it felt good.

Sharma said nothing regarding their squashed positioning on the narrow bed, as she walked across the room. She only smiled before setting about checking the monitors and adjusting the medication lines.

Since Avitus’ earlier promise to the refugees about a view of the stars, an idea had been percolating in his mind behind all the worry. By now, the  _ Adtonitus  _ had broken atmosphere and had set course for the  _ Nexus _ . He’d felt the familiar rumble of the thrusters and the split-second of lightness before the ship’s artificial gravity had kicked in.

Now was as good a time as any to ask.

“B’aytaya,” he whispered to get her attention, careful not to wake his love. The asari turned towards him with a small hum of question, her head tilting to the side almost reminiscent of how a turian would ask a silent question. “Is it possible to set him up in my quarters?”

Her mouth twisted to the side as she considered the request. A hesitant nod followed. She kept her voice as low as his own. “He’s been improving steadily, moving him will likely aggravate the burns, but if what you have in mind is worth a little pain then we can do that.”

Avitus’ eyes shifted from B’aytaya’s face to Macen’s, whose expression remained blank as he slept. For all that the retired Spectre wanted his mate to never be in pain again, this would be worthwhile. It was the one thing that he’d promised they would see together.

Carefully, Avitus extracted himself from Macen’s arms. 

“It is. I’ll be back soon.”

The doctor didn’t argue, instead, she started with preparations to move her patient.

From the medical bay, he stopped off in his quarters to both drop off his armour and move the bed around. The room that he’d lamented was too large was suddenly perfect. The extraneous space gave him enough room to spin the bed around to face the floor to ceiling viewing ports.

Once he was satisfied with how he’d settled the furniture, the Pathfinder dressed and headed out to check on the rest of the crew. He’d chosen clothing he knew Macen would appreciate for the brief time he wore it, that was professional looking enough to walk about the ship in. It was a simple pair of black pants and a fitted tunic in soft blue.

His first stop took him up the ladder to confirm all was in order with Telaxis and Warren. His XO gave him a quick status report summarized with an -all is well-. Whereas his pilot informed him they were about twelve hours from the  _ Nexus _ . Medical aid had been arranged for their arrival.

Then Avitus went back to the briefing area where the turian team had set up. They’d been taking turns contacting loved ones on the  _ Nexus  _ in between sending messages and getting cleaned up. Sharma had already been up to clear them all for duty and he could see numerous empty dishes stacked off to the side. Someone had ensured they were fed. Probably the doctor’s doing as well, she had a penchant for dextro-cooking that she refused to explain.

Back down on the crew deck, he found Ted and Roor’sma in quarters. They were bickering over the merits of leaving the eioch’s talon marks to scar or not. Avitus knew better than to get involved and let them be.

When he’d returned to the medical bay, his gaze first caught on Macen’s sleeping form. His chest rose and fell with an even timbre, his mandibles fluttering ever so slightly with his breath. Most of the wires and tubes were gone, those that remained were all of the portable variety. 

Sharma breezed past him, carrying the equipment she needed to set up. As much as Avitus wanted his mate to rest, his heart was set on giving him a better welcome to Andromeda.

He needed to give him something better than waking from a six-hundred-year long sleep to the sound of blaring alarms. Better than having his chest ripped open and his plates burned off in places. Better than months alone in the clouded over haze that was Havarl. Better than being alone.

Avitus’ knuckles brushed across Macen’s cheek-plate.

It only took a moment before his eyelids started to flutter and his eyes to open. The expression moved from mild confusion to relief when his face came into focus. “Avi.”

“Right here, love.” He told him, pressing their crests together for a moment. 

“Whendidyougetup?” he mumbled through a stifled yawn. His good arm rose to catch the talons against his cheek and keep them there. 

Avitus pulled back just enough to look at him, smiling. “Not long, I’ve got a surprise for you.” There was a note of interest that entered his voice, almost mischievous in its tone. He chuckled. “That can wait a little longer, love.”

Macen flicked his crest, amused. “Can’t blame me. Been six-hundred years.”

“Right,” Avitus raised his brow as he moved to pick Macen up. “This will be almost as good. Promise.”

“Kay,” Macen said as he wrapped his left arm around Avitus’ cowl. He seemed to understand moving wasn’t going to be pleasant as he carefully inhaled and exhaled a few times to steady his breathing. Avitus waited for his nod and then lifted him in one smooth, careful motion.

Without the armour, Avitus could feel exactly how light Macen had become. His joints protruded out too far, his angles were too sharp. The sheet slipped away as he raised him up, showing off his muscle atrophied legs too. 

Had Avitus not had a task set, he might’ve broken down. Instead, he started to walk. The doors opened automatically for him and the hallway was empty. As they walked Macen’s head curled into his shoulder, his face nuzzling into his throat. Macen tried to stifle a whine and failed. 

“Almost there, close your eyes.”

Macen drew in a tight breath and nodded a little.

It was enough to get them into the Pathfinder’s cabin. Sharma had just finished getting things set, a fluids bag hung from a pole behind the headboard and some monitoring equipment sat on the table next to the bed. A covered plate sat there too, a pleasing aroma escaping from underneath it. She helped Avitus settle the sheets around Macen after he was lowered to the turian-styled bed.

“I’ll come to check in, in a few hours. Get some rest, both of you.”

Avitus hummed an acknowledgment, his attention purely focused on his mate’s comfort rather than her words. The door closed behind her and they were left alone once again. He dimmed the lights before slipping out of his clothes and getting into the bed with Macen.

“Open your eyes,” Avitus said.

Slowly, Macen did and they widened to the size of saucers. Out the viewports, there was the most spectacular view of the stars. Finally, after all this time, they were home. 

A few minutes passed before Macen turned to him. “You were right, Avi. They really are brighter.”

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -VV


End file.
